Not to let the tainted tears drop and wane

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My father used to read me a story before bed every night. My day’s most eagerly anticipated moment was then. Not just the stories, but also his time and affection, in
my opinion. He used to have a girl who battled against the odds as the protagonist of his stories. Every conceivable issue has a solution, my brain has been sort of learning, and I truly lived by it. I’m here writing this blog because of that. I spent my entire life working for this job, and now I’m outside this massive structure staring at it with the same sense of achievement that a hiker has while looking at the mountains. I wasn’t sure how to deal with the feelings in my thoughts at this time,
because coming from such a humble family It was more than a dream come true to work in one of the biggest companies in the world. After gathering myself, I entered
the building with a strong desire to succeed and provide for my family. As precious as this moment felt to you at the time and as a significant turning point in your life, who knew it would bring me down this road?

I was a member of the sales team, and while I was bringing in business, I wasn’t
quite as effective as some of the people who had been in this industry for the
previous 20 years. I imagined that ultimately if they got to know me, they’d embrace
me once they saw that their skepticism was only a result of the fact that I came from
a totally different culture. All the other people in my time made jokes about me
behind my back and isolated me. All of their bad behavior was becoming worse, but I
just ignored it and concentrated on my job since I didn’t want to bother anyone, or
perhaps I believed it was not important enough to raise a fuss over. I was quite
simple and only looking forward to the break I was about to get soon.

“Sir is calling you in his office,”; umm yes, I’ll be there. He doesn’t typically call me in
his office on a meeting day, so I was a little concerned. In an effort to stop my mind
from racing with all the potential disasters, I enter the room and study his
expressions. As he continues, I feel a little bit more at ease because he mentions a
client who hasn’t been placing orders but is crucial to the business and he wanted
me to deal with it rather than someone else on my team whom I didn’t know. I didn’t
consider the repercussions since I was so excited about the chance and the fact that
he believed in me.

I put a lot of effort into getting the order, and I was ultimately successful. When one
of my co-workers said, “She could only get the order because she seduced the client
in doing so,” I was about to give my boss the report and the credit time papers in the
meeting. I was shocked to hear what he said and furious, but I patiently waited for
my boss to take the initiative and speak on my behalf. Instead of stopping them or
making any other show of respect to me, he remarked that we’ll talk about this later. I
realized at this point that I was not safe and that the situation was not what I had
assumed it to be.

Until I realized my mistake, life kept dragging me deeper and deeper into this
morass. I was afraid after that encounter, which is unusual for me because I don’t
typically take any action, but then several weird men started contacting me and asking if I wanted to have sex with them. I had to file legal charges against these
individuals because they had gone over the line. I learnt my lesson the hard way
and felt I should share it with you so that you may stand up to injustice as soon as it
arises rather than waiting for it to worsen. Following that, I sought counseling, and
this is what I learnt that enabled me to find closure.

Abrasiveness or bullying happens for two reasons. First, bullying individuals are low
in social and emotional intelligence. They have no idea of the damaging impact of
their behavior. They don’t understand why even if they’ve been told many times
they need to change.  Second, bullying individuals are driven by the desire to be
seen as uber, uber competent. Somewhere along the line, they’ve come to
think acting this way is assisting in that endeavor. And if they perceive others as
incompetent, it makes them nervous. They get anxious about their own ability to
appear competent if they have alleged incompetence around them, and they lash
out. They have the ability to process information much more quickly than most
people, so they get frustrated when others can’t keep up. This is incompetence in
their minds, and they believe it slows them down. Beyond those two main
reasons, people also bully because they’ve learned it from somewhere, whether as a
child or from a previous manager. The organization also facilitates bullying. Most
bullies have commonalities in behavior, such as disorganized structure or unclear
goals, high competition, aggressive leaders, or lack of HR support in addressing
employee performance. The organization can also facilitate bullying by rewarding top
producers, which bullies usually are, or having a leader who just tolerates the
behavior. So, is bullying intentional? No. These people aren’t getting up in the
morning excited to make people cry. They get up in the morning intending to get the
job done, and they’ll stop at nothing to ensure it does. But that’s why the organization
needs to step in. If you can help them, see that their behavior actually makes them
look super incompetent, they will change. 

At the workplace, adequate attention has not been paid to the settlement of the
grievances. The legislative framework deals only indirectly with the redressal of
individual grievances and enhancing the awareness of sexual harassment. Bringing
in concerted voices that have witnessed harassment at workplace can bring in more
visibility and action.

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